DEAR ABBY: Miscarriage causes woman to withdraw from friends

Abigail Van Buren
Advice Columnist

DEAR ABBY: Most of my friends and colleagues are having children. I suffered a miscarriage (my first pregnancy) a few months ago, and I have been feeling depressed and helpless. 

We are seeing a fertility specialist, so I am positive about our chances. However, when my husband and I are invited to attend functions with friends, I have been declining because one of his friends recently announced her pregnancy. I have become extremely withdrawn, jealous and anti-social. Is it normal for me to feel this way? I would love to be sociable and happy, but it’s hard. — BABY JEALOUS IN MARYLAND

DEAR BABY JEALOUS: It’s normal to feel some jealousy when those around you seem to experience something easily that you are struggling with. However, to isolate yourself because of it is self-defeating. 

It could help you to talk this through with a licensed therapist. You are not alone in having these feelings, and the therapist can give you tools to help you cope. Ask your fertility specialist for a referral. I’m sure you won’t be the first patient to do that, and it might bring you comfort.